The classic Monty Python sketch, where push people sit sons comparing words to see if they sound woody or tinny is not just funny. It’s basis rings true with all words, especially baby names.
With the imminent (well, six month) arrival of our first baby boy or girl, the number one topic at the moment is baby names. We have already chosen a girls first and middle name (neither of which are woody names). In fact, all the girls names we liked are tinny names. I think woody girls names are often too masculine, such as Bertha, or Dorothy. Very woody, especially Bertha.
It’s boys names however that has caused much and continuing debate. Keeping in mind that some boys names can be cute when it’s still a baby, such as Timmy or Ned, you have to keep in mind that one day little Timmy will be a man, so Timmy becomes a very tinny and unsuitable name. Is at this time that you want a good woody name, like Barrington or Maximus, that portray masculinity. So to not be too extreme, you try to find a middle ground.
Bit then a new dilemma arises! You find that all the baby names you like are now popular, and thus common. Argh! My future heir must have an uncommon name so as to stand out from the crowd. So for inspiration you begin looking at words not commonly associated with a persons name (whilst still ensuring they are woody words, ones you can say on a loud, deep, booming voice) such as Obsidian, or Melancholy. Though when putting this in context to a person who one day will need to fill in a job application form, such names appear ludicrous, so are discarded.
Even harder still, once you do choose a name you do both agree on, you then have to put this with your surname. One would not think that an awesome surname like Hunter would be hard to chose a name for, however there are serious things to consider. Firstly, you can’t have any names beginning with C or K, for fear that people will pick up on the initial and surname “C Hunt(er)” which when said sounds like a rude (and rather tinny) word.
You’ve also got to consider nouns, so that the first name with the surname doesn’t sound silly. We can’t exactly call our son Rabbit or House Hunter now can we. Even shortened names for one we may pick, like Richard, result in the pornstar sounding name of Dick Hunter.
So for now the debate shall continue, probably for the next 6 months, after which we’ll probably just pull a name for a hat, and after which the baby will probably end up being a girl anyway.
Incidentally, of anyone has any inspiring (and woody) baby names, let me know!
Simple-Human 